The Funny Farm and the Sorcerer's Stone
by Schmo and Sushi
Summary: DONE! It all began when 6 American Muggleborns get their Hogwarts letters. Be there through all their heartache and joy, love and enmity, as they complete their first year at wizarding school... no romance yet !
1. So It Begins

**Full summary:**

It all began when 6 American Muggleborns get their Hogwarts letters. Be there through all their heartache and joy, love and enmity, as they complete their first year with Harry and Ron and Hermione and Dean and Seamus and—I think you get the point. Let's begin, then!

**And now for the story.**

"Hannah! A letter for you."

The brunette took the yellowed parchment from her father. "Wait," she said, her blue eyes puzzled, "you gave me Haley's letter."

Mr. Schreiter's eyes sparkled with mischief. "I already gave your older sister hers."

Hannah, eyes wide, looked down at her letter. "'Miss H. Schreiter, attic bedroom, 1165 Crestview Drive'—Dad! Is this what I think it is?"

Mr. Schreiter shrugged. "Possibly…"

Hannah tore into her letter. "'Dear Miss Schreiter'," she read aloud, "'we are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at _Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry_!' Dad! I'm a witch!"

At this outburst, an older girl popped out from a cupboard. "Niña! Were you accepted at Hogwarts?"

"Yes, Haley, yes I was!"

Haley screamed. "You're going to Hogwarts with me! Yay!"

"I gotta call Rachel!" Hannah exclaimed, reaching for the telephone receiver. Before she could pick it up, however, it rang. "Hello?" she answered.

"Hey, Hannah, it's Rachel! You'll never guess what I got—I know you won't because it's so weird and unexpected—though I always hoped that I was one, you know, after Haley got her letter—I was so excited when I got it—here's a hint: it came with an owl—"

"Take a breath, Rach," Hannah said. "I got one too!"

The prattle on the other end ceased abruptly. "You what?" Rachel breathed.

"I'm going to Hogwarts with you," Hannah said slowly and clearly.

Another voice cut across theirs. "Schmurf? You're going with us?"

"Yes, Katelyn," Hannah said impatiently. "You three-way-calling me?"

"Yeah."

"Ah."

"Hannah—" Rachel said breathlessly, "Tanya called to say she and Sarah and Shelby are going, too!"

"_No way." _Tanya, Sarah, and Shelby were the final three girls that made up the Funny Farm, a group of close friends from the States.

"Way."

There was a silence, in which Rachel began humming absentmindedly. It sounded oddly like the 'Bewitched' theme song.

"Well," Katelyn said finally, " I should go pack…"

"Hmm…"

Rachel sighed. "My dad and I have to buy plane tickets and make arrangements and all that jazz."

"So…"

"We're going to England!"

-------------------------------------

One month later, six American witches stepped off the plane at London International Airport. They retrieved their luggage at the baggage claim (most of it consisted of clean underwear and socks, because they would be wearing their uniform most of the year) and took a rented minivan to their hotel, where they would stay the one night before term started.

"Daddy," Rachel said as they dropped off their belongings at the hotel, "can we go to Diagon Alley now, _please_?"

"Diagon Alley?"

Rachel sighed heavily. "You know, the place where everyone goes for their school stuff…did you honestly think we were going to find everything on the streets of London?"

"Why don't we would wait until tomorrow? You'll beat the crowds."

"Daddy," Rachel said, quite serious this time, "The Hogwarts Express leaves tomorrow at eleven o'clock."

"Well…"

"Please, Mr. Hekman, we're all ready," Sarah pleaded.

Mr. Hekman sighed and rolled his eyes good-naturedly. "All right, into the van."

"Yes!" They all clambered into the minivan. "It feels very odd for me to be getting into the driver's side," Rachel said.

"You have no idea," Mr. Hekman said. "Now, which way?"

--------------------------------------------

After they were dropped off at the Leaky Cauldron, the girls hesitantly asked Tom, the barkeeper, what to do. "Go to the back, little misses, Hagrid should be there. If 'e ain't, come an' fetch me, an' I'll get you through." He smiled not unkindly at them, and they did as they were told.

Hagrid, it appeared, was either a small boy with black hair and glasses, or a tall, giant-like man with a wiry beard. Either way, both of them turned to look at them as they approached.

"Er, Tom told us to have Hagrid help us through to Diagon Alley…" Tanya said tentatively,

The giant looked momentarily confused. "Oh, righ'. Well, no time like the present, eh?" Without preamble, he whipped out a pink umbrella and tapped the wall while the boy and the six girls stared shyly at each other.

"All righ', then, here's Diagon Alley." Hagrid stepped aside to let them pass. "C'mon, Harry, thatsa boy."

Hannah stopped and stared as the boy and Hagrid walked away. _Harry…?_ she thought. Yes, it was the right time, if she had her calculations correct. Exactly eleven years since the Boy Who Lived defeated the Dark Lord. He would be about their age by now…

"Hannah?" Shelby asked. "What is it?"

Hannah shook her head. "Nothing. Come on, let's go to Gringotts."

An hour later, they emerged from the white bank, pockets loaded with Galleons, Sickles and Knuts.

"School robes," Rachel read off her list.

"So does that mean we have to have fabric thrown over us and fitted?" Tanya asked in surprise, her pale eyebrows raised in polite confusion.

"I guess so," replied Katelyn.

"Gross!" Tanya shrieked.

"Why is that gross?" Hannah asked.

"I don't know. I just felt like saying that."

Everyone rolled their eyes good-naturedly, then Katelyn exclaimed, "Look! There's Madam Malkin's. It's near Ollivander's Wands."

"Wands last, guys," Rachel said, seeing Sarah and Shelby's faces.

So the girls went into Madam Malkin's. But before she went in, Hannah caught a glimpse of the same dark-haired boy they had seen before go into the apothecary's.

_I must be out of my mind, _Hannah told herself, rubbing her forehead. _It can't be him. It just can't. _She ran into the shop to find Shelby being fitted into her robes.

"Hannah Noel, where were you?" Sarah demanded.

"I just thought I saw someone I…knew," Hannah said quickly and stepped onto the stool as Shelby got off.

"Who did you see?" Shelby asked, snapping her fingers impatiently.

"No one you would know. I didn't even get a good look."

"Come on, you guys, stop bothering her," Katelyn said.

"Eh!" Shelby shouted.

"You're cruisin' for a bruisin', Shelby," Katelyn warned her.

"Don't threaten Beth!" Rachel exclaimed, and then she and Katelyn began arguing.

"Eh, eh, eh, eh!" Shelby stuck her tongue out at Katelyn and barely avoided a slap from Sarah, who then began to yell at her.

"Guys…" Tanya started, but no one listened, so she commenced a shouting match with Hannah.

"Katelyn loves Nate!" Shelby managed to make her voice heard above the chaos.

"That's _it!"_

Katelyn was about to injure Shelby when Madam Malkin cried, "Girls, please! I will have no brawling in my shop!"

Everyone immediately fell silent.

"Thank you." The witch sighed and went back to work.

---------------------------------

"She was a little crabby," Katelyn commented.

"Who?"

"Madam Melbourne or whatever."

"I wonder why," Rachel said dryly, checking her bags for the hundredth time. "D'you think I should have gotten another set of robes? I mean, eight seems a little paltry…"

"Finally!" Hannah cried. "Ollivander's!"

"Olli-who?" Sarah and Shelby asked in unison.

Ignoring them, Rachel, Hannah, Tanya, and Katelyn went into the shop and looked around. When no one came into sight, Rachel stepped up and tapped the little service bell, and a small, reedy wizard came to the front desk. "Six young witches," he said, not unkindly, "ready for Hogwarts, I presume?"

The girls nodded nervously. "We're, ah, not quite sure what…ah…to do."

"You come first, then," the man said to Rachel. She stepped nervously forward, and he started measuring her: her arms, fingers, neck, and height. Finally he stood, disappeared behind a shelf, and emerged with a dusty burgundy box.

"Willow, dragon heartstring, sixteen inches," he said, putting it in her hand. "Go on, give it a wave."

Rachel tentatively swished the wand, immediately causing a chair in the corner to burst into flame. Mr. Ollivander hastily extinguished it and whipped the wand out of her hand, replacing it with a shorter one. "Too swishy, I think. Try this one. Fourteen inches, yew, unicorn hair core. Go on, dear."

She waved the wand gingerly, but instead of something spontaneously combusting, she got a pleasant prickling sensation on the back of her neck.

"That'll be the one, then," Mr. Ollivander said. "Ten Galleons, if you don't mind…"

Half an hour later, the exited the shop, each bearing their treasures: Rachel a fourteen-inch yew with unicorn hair; Hannah with a twelve-inch oak with dragon heartstring; Sarah with a thirteen-inch willow with phoenix feather; Tanya a twelve-inch cherry with dragon heartstring; Katelyn, a twelve-inch mahogany with phoenix feather; and Shelby an eleven-inch ash with unicorn hair.

"Well, we've got every—" Tanya began, but she was cut off by an "_Hola, chicas_!"

A slightly older brunette made her way through the crowd toward them. "My little sister is almost a witch," she said happily, hugging Hannah. "Hi, everyone."

"Hi, Haley," they chorused.

"So, has everyone got their _wands, _and their _books, _and their _robes, _and their _owls…"_

"Owls!" Rachel cried. "I knew I was forgetting—" She broke off as Sarah elbowed her. "What?"

"Look who's coming."

"Who?"

"Tall, handsome…" Sarah sighed.

Haley turned. "Oh, that's Oliver Wood. He's in my year. Hey, Oliver! Have a nice summer?" She turned back. "So, Rachel, you should go—what are you all laughing at?"

Oliver had turned to wave at Haley and walked right into a low-hanging sign. While Haley hurried over to see if he was okay, Rachel ducked into Eeylops', still snickering. She emerged ten minutes later carrying a handsome tawny-colored barn owl in a cage.

"Cool!" everyone cried.

Rachel beamed. "Named him Romulus. You like?"

In answer, Katelyn, Sarah, Shelby, Hannah, and Tanya disappeared into the shop and emerged a while later. Katelyn carried a screech owl; Sarah a speckled brown one; Shelby a small, twittering mottled one; Hannah a grey-feathered tawny owl; and Tanya a brown one with impassive black eyes.

"_Now _we've got everything," Tanya said. "Hogwarts, here we come!"


	2. Got Sorted?

The girls heaved their trunks down the corridor, lurching from side to side as the Hogwarts Express rumbled out of the station. "Oh, why did we wait to board?" Rachel moaned. "The only empty compartments will be at the end." Romulus, swaying back and forth on her shoulder, hooted reproachfully.

Finally they found an empty compartment. Squeezing in, they stowed their trunks and cages on the rack and sat down. It was a nice fit, with room for one or two more people. No sooner had they begun to discuss their new school than the door slid open and a girl floated in.

"Hello," she said in a dreamy voice. "I hope I'm not intruding. Do you mind if I sit?" She did so and pulled a large spell book out of her bag. "My name is Luna. Luna Lovegood."

"Hey, Luna. I'm Shelby Root."

"Hannah Schreiter."

"Katelyn Barcanic."

"Tanya Rogers."

"Sarah Carter."

"And Rachel Hekman!"

"That's nice," Luna said, and disappeared behind her book. She did not emerge again.

After a few minutes of silence, the compartment door slid open again, and a new stepped in. "I hope you don't mind. Everywhere else is full." She sat down between Katelyn and the wall. "I'm Hermione Granger, by the way."

"Hi, I'm Rachel Hekman."

"Shelby Root."

"Tanya Rogers."

"Hannah Schreiter."

"Katelyn Barcanic."

"Sarah Carter."

"Hello." Hermione smiled, then immediately began a nonstop stream of facts about Hogwarts. The girls listened intently, fixed on learning everything they could about their new school.

The compartment door slid open again. It was a boy with a round, fearful face and his school robes were already on. "I've…I've lost a toad…"

"What's your name?" Tanya asked kindly.

"Neville L-Longbottom."

"Sure, we'll help you find your toad," Rachel said. "Let us change first, though, okay?"

Neville's face broke into a smile. 'Thanks."

He left and they changed into their school robes. "We'd better hurry," Sarah said. "I think we'll be there soon!"

-------------------------------------

"Abbot, Hannah?"

"Hufflepuff!"

Tanya gave Katelyn a quick hug as Professor McGonagall called, "Barcanic, Katelyn!"

Katelyn went and sat nervously on the stool and the Sorting Hat was placed on her head. It seemed to think for a moment before calling out, "Gryffindor!"

Smiling so wide she thought her face would burst, Katelyn walked over to the Gryffindor table and Haley, who was waving vigorously.

"Bones, Susan."

"Hufflepuff!"

"Boot, Terry."

"Ravenclaw!"

"Brocklehurst, Mandy?"

"Ravenclaw!"  
"Brown, Lavender."

"Gryffindor!"

"Bulstrode, Millicent."

"Slytherin!"

"Carter, Sarah."

Sarah shakily mounted the platform; back still stinging from the slaps from her friends.

"Ravenclaw!"

The girls cheered as Sarah got up and sat down at the Ravenclaw table.

"Finch-Fletchley, Justin."

"Hufflepuff!"

"Finnigan, Seamus."

"Gryffindor!"

"Granger, Hermione."

Rachel gave her a reassuring thumbs-up as Hermione mounted the platform.

"Gryffindor!"

She leapt off the stool and seated herself across from Katelyn and Haley.

"Hekman, Rachel."

Rachel clenched her fists so tightly as she approached the stool that her fingernails bit into her skin. She sat on the stool and McGonagall put the Sorting Hat on her head.

"Hmm…smart…Ravenclaw? Oh, no, wait! Much courage here, too…hmm…well, we'll try…_Gryffindor!"_

Rachel bounded down the platform to the Gryffindor table and sat down between Hermione and "Finnigan, Seamus." She held up her hand for a high-five from Katelyn, who raised an eyebrow

"Blood."

Rachel blinked and looked at her palm. Spots of blood marked where she had hug in her fingernails. She looked around for a napkin, finally taking one from Seamus. "Thanks," she said, dabbing at her palms.

Several new Gryffindors joined them, including Neville and one Harry Potter, the boy they had met at Diagon Alley. By now they were at "Rogers, Tatiana."

Tanya was sitting under the hat, her pale face peering anxiously at the four House tables. A minute passed, then—

"Gryffindor!"

Katelyn and Rachel cheered the loudest as Tanya sat down next to Haley and across from Seamus, a wide grin on her face.

Next to be Sorted was Shelby, so Rachel and Hermione moved over on the bench to make room for her. Scarcely had the Hat been placed on her head than it screamed,

"Slytherin!"

Katelyn, Tanya, and Rachel all stared in disbelief as Shelby pranced off the platform and went to sit by a blonde boy, "Malfoy, Draco." No sooner had they snapped their mouths shut than none other than Hannah filled the empty space intended for Shelby.

Two more Gryffindors joined them ("Thomas, Dean," and "Weasley, Ronald"), then an old man with a crooked nose and a silvery beard stepped up.

"Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Oddment! Blubber! Tweak!

"Thank you!"

Even though it _was _funny, Rachel had to agree with Harry: their new headmaster seemed a little…odd.

------------------------------------

An hour later, Hannah, Rachel, Tanya and Katelyn were in their beds, feeling full and sleepy. "I can't wait for tomorrow," came Hermione's voice through the darkness. "I worked so hard on learning everything I could…"

"D'you suppose we'll have homework?" Lavender asked.

"Probably," said Hannah.

"Charms sounds fun." Rachel yawned.

"Yeah...whaddaya thin,' Tanya?" Katelyn asked thickly.

Silence.

So one by one they dropped off to sleep, full of food and anticipation.


	3. In Which Lots of Unrelated Things Happen

"I can't _believe _I wanted this week to come," Rachel moaned, setting down her bag with a thump. She sank down into an armchair—and jumped right back up again, picking up what looked like a deflated soccer ball with spines. After inspecting it for a moment, she took it across the room and tossed it in Dean's lap. "I believe this is yours."

He looked at it, horrified, plucking one of the quills out of the thick skin. "What the h—"

"I would tell my friends what it is if I were you," Rachel said, cutting across Dean's loud profanity, "so they won't attack it next chance they get." She turned to go back to her chair.

"Hey, Hekman!"

She turned back. "Hey, Finnigan!"

"Sure, but how do we know 'tweren't you who did it?" Seamus asked suspiciously.

"It wasn't," Harry said, jumping to her aid.

Rachel left them to argue it out and went to sit serenely by the fire, pulling her nearly Transfiguration homework toward her.

Tanya, who was looking rather pale due to stress, looked up. "Hey, Rachel, can you help me?"

Rachel looked over at Tanya's parchment. "Defense Against the Dark Arts, huh? Well, I think Quirrel's bogus, but sure, I'll help you. Here." She took a piece of parchment from her bag and tossed it to Tanya. "I'm going to bed now. G'night."

Sighing, Tanya copied down the answers, extinguished her candle, and followed suit.

--------------------------------------------

"Double Potions first," Hannah said the next morning.

Katelyn froze with a piece of toast halfway to her mouth. "With who?"

"Slytherins," Rachel said, checking her own schedule.

"Well, we'll see Shelby, at least."

Rachel wrinkled her nose. "Along with that awful boy she's always hanging around with. _Draco _Something-Or-Other."

"I heard his father's really well known," Hannah said.

Seamus looked around. "A real son of a—too, from what I've heard."

Professor McGonagall, who happened to be passing, rapped Seamus hard over the head with her wand, and Rachel had to muffle her laughter in a napkin.

"Shelby! Hey—Shelby!"

Katelyn, Hannah, and Rachel ran to catch up with the short blonde. "Hiya, Pickles," Katelyn said, hugging her. Hannah and Rachel did the same. "We've missed you!"

Shelby opened her mouth to speak, but a cold, drawling voice cut across her own. "Hey, look. Root's got some new friends."

They turned to see a smirking Draco Malfoy. "Buzz off, Malfoy," Hannah snapped.

Draco's smirk got even wider. "And what's a filthy Mudblood like you going to do about it?"

Katelyn made a furious move toward Malfoy, but Rachel caught her by the neck of her robes. "Calm down," she hissed. "Fighting's not going to solve anything."

"That's right, _Hekman," _Malfoy hissed. "Crabbe, Goyle, Root, come on." He shoved past the girls. "Move out of my way, Mudbloods."

It was over in a second: Rachel whipped out her wand, cried "_Wingardium Leviosa_!" and Draco was hovering helplessly ten feet above the floor while Crabbe and Goyle looked stupidly on.

"Miss Hekm—I say, Miss Hekman!" Professor McGonagall hurried up, straightening her hat. "Put him down at once!"

"Right, Professor," Rachel said, jerking her wand away sharply. Malfoy thudded to the floor and huddled against the wall, whimpering.

"That was—" McGonagall said breathlessly, "that was very unwise of you—I can't believe—a Gryffindor! Detention, Miss Hekman, and—and five points from Gryffindor."

"Yes, Professor," Rachel said darkly.

"Come, Mr. Malfoy," Professor McGonagall said, "I doubt you've been injured enough to miss Potions. I'll tell Professor Snape what happened." When Malfoy continued to cower and cringe, she snapped, "Get up, Malfoy, stop your sniveling."

Yet, however pleasing it was to see their Head of House tell off Draco Malfoy, nothing could make up for what they got in Potions.

"Fighting in the corridors, were you?" Snape asked, his black eyes glittering. "Detention, I think, for each of you, and…let's see—fifteen points from Gryffindor. Go to your seats and I will have another word with Professor McGonagall."

But worst of all, Shelby wouldn't talk to them.

With heavy hearts, the girls found their seats, grateful that, at least, no one had seen their punishment. Tanya, Seamus, Dean, Harry, Ron, Hermione, and the rest of the Gryffindors soon joined them.

"Hi, Shelbeth," Tanya cried, waving across the aisle at her. Shelby cocked an eyebrow and looked at her in disgust.

"What's wrong?" Tanya asked, hurt. Shelby had never done that to her before.

"Nothing's wrong," Malfoy retorted. She's over hanging around with Mudbloods, because she's in _Slytherin. _She's with the _right_ people now."

"Surely you can't mean _yourself!"_ Rachel exclaimed, astonished. All the Gryffindors laughed.

"You're Mudbloods!" Malfoy spat. "Every last one of you!"

"So's Shelby," Rachel replied nonchalantly, then clapped a hand over her mouth as someone gasped. "Oops!" She sank down in her chair.

Malfoy looked stricken for once, but Shelby said hastily, "Uh, don't worry, Draco…I'm not _really _a Mudblood. They're just trying to get back at me."

Malfoy smirked. "I knew you were true Slytherin," he said proudly. "You deserve to be with us."

All the Gryffindors rolled their eyes in disgust, then the dungeon door flew open and Snape stomped in.

"There will be no foolish wand-waving or silly incantations in this class," he said.

Neville gulped.

------------------------------------

"You got _detentions_?" Hermione asked incredulously.

Rachel turned her face toward the back of the armchair as Katelyn shrugged. "Rachel got two."

Tanya reached over and tapped one of Rachel's stocking-clad feet that were hanging off the side of the armchair. "Why'd you get detentions?"

Rachel mumbled something incoherent, so several people had to lean forward. "Sorry, didn't quite catch that," red-haired Ron said.

Katelyn sighed. "She hexed Malfoy in the corridors."

This got nearly the opposite reaction they'd expected. Neville's face split into a wide grin, and Dean, Harry, Ron, and Seamus slapped hands.

"I didn't hex him, Katelyn," Rachel protested. "I—"

"You just made him hang upside down for a minute," Hannah finished, grinning.

At this announcement, Seamus and Dean both jumped to their feet and hurried over to high-five Rachel.

"I helped," Hannah said, slightly put out.

"You did," replied Rachel, who was quite pink from all the attention.

Once things had calmed down a bit, Hermione asked, "What did he do to make you charm him?"

Hannah's face fell. "He called us…_Mudbloods_."

Everyone's mouths fell open, and, after a second of silence, started shouting angrily.

"Filthy Slytherins…"

"Son of a—"

"I'll Mudblood him!"

"Who does he think he _is_?"

Hermione looked sympathetic. "Don't pay any attention to him, all of you. He likes that word."

"What do you mean?"

Hermione shrugged unconcernedly. "He's called me that occasionally."

It was the Gryffindor Funny Farm's turn to feel sympathetic. "I'm sorry, Hermione," Rachel said, reaching over to hug her.

"Thanks, Rachel."

"Malfoy _totally _sucks," Katelyn said.

There was murmured assenting, then silence, which was broken only by Seamus swearing under his breath and his occasional outburst of "who does he think he is?"

Rachel finally had enough. She performed a silencing charm on him, patted him patronizingly on the head, and went upstairs with a sweet "Good night!"

Seamus spent the rest of the evening glowering darkly at anyone who made fun of him.

----------------------------------

Katelyn and Hannah returned from their Potions detention to find Rachel in near hysterics. She was huddled in a corner with her face buried in her hands.

"What's wrong?" Katelyn asked Haley, who was sitting by Rachel.

"She just got back from her Transfiguration detention," Haley replied quietly.

"That's not so bad," Hannah said.

"Well, she also got a 'D' on the homework and got another ten points docked from Gryffindor."

Rachel gave a mighty sniff and shuddered a little.

"Oh, and Shelby's badmouthing her all over Hogwarts."

There was a dull thud as Rachel hit her forehead on the wall, and Haley put her arms around her again. "Fred and George Weasley got you something warm from the kitchens."

Rachel sniffed again, and George handed her a cup of hot tea.

"Anything that hurts a Slytherin is worth anything you get," Seamus said fiercely as Rachel sipped from the mug.

"I guess you're right," she sighed. "After all, it _was _fun teasing Malfoy like that…"

"But if you don't want any more detentions, you'd better not do anything like that again," Hannah warned.

"Then what would we do for fun?" Katelyn asked shrewdly.

"Good point," Hannah acknowledged. "Rule-breaking is just about the only fun you can have around here. Even that comes with consequences."

"True," Rachel began, "but there has to be something else that's fun around here besides rule breaking. I mean, I don't want to get in trouble for everything I do!"

"Well, you're off to a rocky start, aren't you?" Haley said dryly, and Rachel broke down into tears again.

"Shove off," Hermione snapped at the bewildered onlookers. "Hey, Rachel, everything's going to be fine."

Rachel sniffed dramatically and drank the rest of her tea. "I guess you're right," she said. "Ain't no bully gonna pick on me." She stood up and strode briskly over to the small table where her book bag was. Ripping out a piece of wrinkled parchment, she crumpled it up and tossed it into the fire; grabbed a fresh sheet and a quill, sat down, and started scribbling.

"What's she doing?" Dean whispered.

"I don't know," replied Seamus, awestruck.

Within ten minutes, Rachel was done. She handed in the revised essay, and got an 'A' and ten points for Gryffindor. As she returned to her seat, beaming, Seamus turned to Neville, sharing the same look of pleasant surprise.

"We _really _should get her angry more often," he said.


	4. Halloween

"BOO!"

A grinning Sarah leapt out from behind a statue upon the startled-looking Katelyn, Rachel, Tanya, and Hannah. "Hi, guys!"

Rachel turned to their companions. "You guys go ahead. Save us seats." She looked back at Sarah as Seamus, Dean, Lavender, Parvati, Harry, Ron, etc. walked away. "Hey, Cubes, what's up?"

"Especially with the makeup," Katelyn said, eyebrows raised so high they were in danger of disappearing completely. Sarah was wearing dark eyeshadow and lipstick and looked positively ghoulish.

"It's Halloween," Sarah said jubilantly.

"So?" Tanya asked.

"It's Halloween at _Hogwarts, _dorks," she replied. "Come on. I don't want to miss the feast."

They entered the Great Hall, waved goodbye to Sarah, and took their seats next to Hermione, Ron, Harry, Seamus, and the Weasley twins.

"Hey, Hannah?" George said, leaning past everyone to see down the row.

"What?"

"Look at Haley!"

Hannah looked down the table and saw Haley deeply engaged in conversation with Oliver Wood.

Hannah suppressed a giggle and went back to her talk with Rachel, Katelyn, Tanya, Hermione, Dean, Harry, Ron, and Seamus.

"So, do you think exams will be hard?" Hermione asked out of the blue.

"I hope not!" Tanya exclaimed. "I don't want to fail my first year!"

"Well," Percy Weasley said pompously, "if you pay attention in class, you'll do fine."

"It shouldn't be too difficult," Rachel said. "After all, we _are _only first years."

Seamus and Dean nodded. "The _real _killers are your O.W.L.s in fifth year and the N.E.W.T.s in seventh."

"Owls? Newts?"

"Ordinary Wizarding Levels and Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Tests," Seamus replied.

Rachel's eyes widened. "And I thought S.A.T.s sounded scary."

"S.A.T.s? What does that stand for?"

She shrugged. "I have no idea, actually."

Seamus shook his sandy-colored head. "You empty-headed Americans. Don't know nothing." He jumped as Rachel kicked him under the table. "_What?"_

"Don't insult us Yankees again, leprechaun" —Seamus scowled— "or you may find out what Malfoy experienced ten feet above the ground." She put her elbows on the table and leaned closer. "Let me tell you this Pureblood to Pureblood: I don't like being made fun of."

"Pureblood?" he asked. "I'm half-and-half. And I thought you were Muggle-born."

"I am," she replied, nodding. "Look—you're all Irish, aren't you?"

"I am," Seamus said proudly.

She sat back. "Well, I'm all Dutch. Does that explain it?"

Seamus leaned forward in interest. "Really? You're Dutch? Me aunt's mam is Dutch! What do you know about it?"

Rachel beamed; she was glad to have an enthusiastic audience for her abundant store of knowledge. "Well, I—" She was cut off as the door to the Great Hall slammed open.

'"Troll! In the dungeons!" Quirrell ran in, shouting as he went. "Troll!" He stopped next to Seamus, swayed, said, "Though you ought to know," and fainted.

The Great Hall erupted in screaming and everyone got up to run for their lives. But Dumbledore shot sparks from his wand and bellowed, "Silence!"

All the students stopped abruptly.

"Now," he began again, "prefects, lead your Houses back to the dormitories immediately!"

"Tanya, Hannah, come help me!" Rachel cried. They hurried to help her lift Professor Quirrell from the ground. "He'll get trampled if we leave him here." Yet, try as they might, they could not get him up, much less move him. It was as if he was the weight of two normal people.

Rachel scanned the crowd anxiously. Seamus, Dean, and Katelyn were at the far end, and Harry and Ron were nowhere to be seen. "What should we do?" she moaned, her back breaking from Quirrell's dead weight.

Suddenly the strain lifted, and a beaming, pixyish face appeared under Quirrell's arm.

"Beth!"

Shelby's face broke into a grin. "Hi!"

"Where's Malfoy?" Hannah asked.

The grin melted off her face. "Just got away. Need some help?"

"Yes," Tanya said emphatically.

"Okay." They began to move slowly toward the doors. "Where do you want him?" Shelby asked once they entered the foyer.

"Right here's good," Rachel said, and they propped him up against a wall.

"Professor?" Tanya asked tentatively. No response.

"Professor."

"Professor…"

"Professor!"

"There's got to be a better way," Hannah said darkly.

"Okay. How about we all shout his name?" Tanya suggested.

"Okay."

"All right. One…two…three!"

"Professor Quirrell!" they shouted in unison, and Shelby shook him for good measure.

He slowly opened his eyes, stirring theatrically.

"We'll help you to the Hospital Wing, Professor," Tanya said nervously.

"N-no, t-that won't b-b-be necessary, g-girls," he said, standing shakily. "I'll-I'll t-t-take my-s-s-self, t-t-thank you. Y-you'd b-best get your-yourselves t-t-t-to your d-d-dormitories."

"Yes, Professor."

They got up and started up the corridor, jumping nervously at every noise. About ten minutes later, they came upon a slightly dusty, but beaming, Ron, Harry, and Hermione.

"What happened to _you?" _Rachel asked in disbelief.

"It's a long story," Hermione said. "I—"

"What's _she _doing here?" Ron interrupted loudly, pointing at Shelby.

She blinked. "Oh! My dormitory's the other way." She turned, waved, and scurried off.

"She's really very nice," Tanya said apologetically.

"That Malfoy kid's controlling her every move," Hannah said, stomping her foot.

"I understand," Hermione said. "Come on. We'll walk and talk."

They returned to find a nearly empty common room. "Where is everyone?" Hannah asked, puzzled.

They had just sat down to discuss this newest turn of events when the portrait hole swung open again.

"They…didn't…come back…after supper…Professor," came Seamus's breathless voice.

"So…we came…for ylou," added Katelyn's.

She came into view, clutching a stitch in her side. "They're not—oh." She stopped short as she caught sight of them.

Seamus entered the common room, groaned, and slumped forward, hands on his knees. "Never mind, Professor," he said to the matronly figure behind him.

Professor McGonagall straightened her hat. "Miss Granger, Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, haven't you gotten in enough trouble tonight? Up to your dormitories, immediately. You, too, Mr. Finnigan, Miss Hekman, Miss Schreiter, Miss Barcanic, Miss Rogers."

"Yes, Professor."

As they got up, Professor McGonagall shook her head and turned to leave, though not before they heard something that sounded suspiciously like "First years."


	5. Gryffindor VS Slytherin

It was the first Quidditch game of the season, and spirits were high. Bedecked in their scarlet and gold finest, the Gryffindors made their way to the Quidditch field to cheer on their team.

"Come on, Harry!" Rachel cried, waving a scarlet pennant around in the air.

Down the row in the stands a little ways was Haley, cheering on her unofficial boyfriend of four days, Oliver Wood; and Ron Weasley, cheering his brothers Fred and George.

"I _love _Quidditch!" Tanya cried. "I talked to the seventh year Chaser—I might get on the team!"

Rachel grabbed a corner of the handmade sheet-banner the boys had made that was blowing in her face. "I _really _want to be a Beater—maybe Fred'll let me take turns." She handed her corner back to Seamus. "I think—come on, Angelina! —that Professor McGonagall might—" Her voice was drowned out as Gryffindor scored.

"Take that, Slytherin!" Seamus yelled. They moved down the row for the gamekeeper, Hagrid, and he punched a fist into the air. They watched for a minute, then—

"Was that the Snitch?"

The crowd went wild as the Slytherin Seeker Terence Higgs and Harry hurtled across the field. Harry had almost got it when—

_Wham!_

The trollish Marcus Flint slammed into Harry, sending him spinning away like a top.

"Interference!" Katelyn, Hannah, Rachel, and Tanya cried. Farther down the row they heard Dean shouting something about soccer and the red card.

It was an uneventful game for the next few minutes, as far as Quidditch goes, with no more goals except the foul. They all relaxed slightly, each privately sure that their team was going to win.

Rachel sneezed suddenly, and her wand fell to the floor with a clatter. She ducked down to retrieve it, and when she returned to a standing position, Harry's broom was jerking around in an odd manner. "What's he _doing?"_

"Something's wrong with his broom!" Katelyn shrieked.

Seamus tapped Rachel on the shoulder. "Hermione wants your attention."

Hermione motioned vigorously to her. "Come on!"

"All right, all right, I'm coming," Rachel said, following her out of the stands.

"Snape's jinxing Harry's broom," Hermione panted as they raced to the next tower.

"_What?_ Hermione, have you eaten your socks by mistake?"

Ignoring this slight on her mental health, Hermione said, "He's not blinking, and you need eye contact to jinx someone. Now stay here and don't let anyone up." She ducked behind the voluminous cloaks and disappeared from view.

A minute later she reappeared, looking flushed. "Run!"

They raced back down the stairs, up their tower, and took their seats, panting, faces pink from the cold.

"Where were you?" Seamus asked. "Och, no, and something else is wrong with Harry. Look!"

Rachel looked where he was pointing. There, on the ground, was Harry. He lurched, opened his mouth and—

"It's the Snitch!" Rachel screamed. "He's got the Snitch! We've won!"

"Ah, do tell me what's goin' on," Seamus pleaded, nonplussed.

"Harry got the Snitch!" she cried, jumping up and down. "We won! We won!" She threw her arms around him in her exhilaration.

He got the gist and hugged her back, joining the thunderous applause and cheering.

------------------------------------

"You won! You won! You won!"

Harry was engulfed in hugs from all the first year girls. "I didn't win," he tried to protest, but no one would hear of it.

"Nonsense," Rachel said airily.

"We saw you. The whole team did great!" Tanya said jubilantly.

"Especially Oliver," Haley said from a corner where she was sharing a chair with said Keeper.

Hannah rolled her eyes in disgust. "You did awesome, Harry."

Hermione nodded. "When's your next game?"

He shrugged. "Dunno."

Katelyn beamed. "We'll support you all the way, Harry."

"Totally."

"Utterly."

"Downright."

"Absolutely."

"Unconditionally."

"No strings attached."

"I get the idea," Harry said dryly. "Thanks anyway."

"No problem."

"None whatsoever."


	6. Yuletide Overseas?

"Bye, guys!" Rachel waved with one hand, brushing snowflakes off her eyelashes with the other. "Have a great Christmas!"

Tanya's, Katelyn's, Hermione's, and Sarah's farewells were lost in the swirl of snow and wind, but Rachel got the idea and waved a hand, ducking back into the warm castle. "I'm going to run up to Gryffindor Tower to get something," she told Hannah. "Then I told Harry and Ron we'd eat with them. We _are _the only Gryffindor first years left, anyway."

Hannah nodded. "Sounds good."

When they reached their common room, Hannah flopped down with Seamus to warm up by the fire, and Rachel hurried up the stairs. Ten minutes later, she came back down. "Let's go," she said. "Seamus! Why're you not going home?"

"I live a ways away," he said, standing. "Sure, but it's a hassle, you know? Why're you staying?"

"My parents can't afford to fly me overseas four times a year. I'm okay with it, though." She smiled, but Seamus could see her red-rimmed eyes. "Come on."

Hannah patted her back soothingly as they passed a rather ugly statue of a one-eyed crone. "Haley stayed, too, 'cause it's _much _too expensive to fly us both back home to O'Hare two times a year, then back."

Seamus nodded, concentrating on his sneakers as Rachel wiped her cheeks with her sleeve. "Me brother, Francis, had the same problem."

"What happened to him?"

"Sure," Seamus said thoughtfully, "but he was expelled in his third year. But that's not the point."

Rachel laughed, patting his back. "Thanks, Seam."

"'Shame'?"

"Yeah! Like, 'it's the _Seam_ thing'…Seam…same…get it? Hah, hah."

Seamus blinked. "Aye, and you'll be calling me that from now on, won't ye?"

Rachel stopped mid stride. "Call you…yes! That's your new nickname! The Seam Thing!" She laughed.

"Well, you cheered her up, at any rate," Hannah said.

"Yes, but at what price?" Seamus replied dryly. "I fear I've just sealed my doom. Aye, she'll never forget it."

"And you know it," Rachel called gleefully.

Seamus sighed.

-------------------------------

"Merry Christmas, Schmurf!"

Hannah jumped as a pillow hit her in the face. "Nuffasnuffa," she mumbled, rolling over.

"Come on, Han," Rachel said, throwing another pillow. "We have presents!"

"Presents?" Hannah sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "Where?"

Rachel ignored her and began ripping open her gifts. "Oh, cool, Hannah, a journal! How'd you know I left mine at home?" She opened it, and a bright voice filled the room. "'To accomplish great things, we must dream as well as act'."

"It's got a quote of the day, too! Thanks, Hannah."

"No problem. Ooh! A gift card to Flourish and Blotts!"

Ten minutes later, swimming in wrapping paper and hyped up on chocolate from Honeydukes, they opened their last gifts.

"Oh, another one from my parents," Rachel said. "Feels like a book—oh, it is! But I already have this one: _Magical Beings of Europe."_

"Look. I have one from Seamus!" Hannah said, mildly surprised.

"Me too. Ah, but I didn't get him one."

"Me neither."

"Oh, well, I'll give him the _Magical Beings_ book. It'll go nicely with what he gave me."

"Which is what?"

"'_Magical Equines: where to find them, how to train them, and where to acquire a suitable alternative'; _and _'Quidditch Through the Ages.'_ They're short. You?"

"_'Quidditch Through the Ages' _and _'Muggle Studies III: Arts II: Muggle music, dance, and literature'._ He has the Van Halen page bookmarked! I'll give him this pack of chocolate frogs."

"I suppose we can go over there now," Rachel said, glancing out the window.

"Yeah. The sun's up, and only he and Harry and Ron are there, anyway."

"Come on, then," Rachel replied, standing and putting her new Christmas robe on over her flannel pajamas. Hannah did the same, and they tiptoed over to the boys' dormitories.

"Seamus? Harry? Ron?" Hannah whispered, tapping lightly on the door. There was no answer.

"Maybe we beat them in waking up," Rachel suggested. "Why don't we sneak in and set our presents by theirs?"

Hannah nodded. "Okay, I'll go first." She took hold of the handle, turned it and opened the door.

It was chaos.

For such a low number of boys, they were able to produce a surprisingly decent-sized whirlwind of feathers from their pillows. Coughing and sneezing, Rachel and Hannah walked in. As the feathers settled, the vague forms of Harry and Ron and Seamus came into view.

"Well, isn't this interesting?" Hannah asked mildly.

Rachel pulled out her wand and soon she and Hannah had the room clean and the pillows fixed. 'There. That's better, isn't it?"

Seamus and Ron looked slightly put out. "What do you want?" Seamus asked.

Rachel tossed _Magical Beings_ at him. "Merry Christmas, you ungrateful leprechaun, you." She pulled out some Honeydukes chocolate and gave them to Harry and Ron. "Feliz Navidad."

Hannah gave them the chocolate frogs. "Ditto."

As you might imagine, their attitudes changed tremendously after the gifts.

"That was nice of them, I guess," Seamus said, flipping through the book.

Ron stuffed a chocolate frog into his mouth. "They're not so bad, for girls."

"You'd think they _liked _us or something," Harry said sarcastically, and Ron and Seamus laughed.

Suddenly, Ron swallowed his chocolate frog. "Hey…wait a minute!"

-----------------------

At the end of Christmas holiday, Hermione, Tanya, Katelyn and Sarah all came back from their vacations, chattering about how much fun they'd had. Sarah prattled on and on about the all the cute boys she had met in Mexico. Hannah, Rachel, Tanya, and Katelyn had to keep hitting her every five minutes to show just how annoying she was.

But things weren't any better in class. The professors kept piling mountains of homework on everyone. In fact, it was so much, even Hermione was complaining!

"How do they expect us to do all this?" she cried one evening as everyone worked like bees in the common room.

"Come off it, Hermione," Katelyn told her in a fake British accent. "I mean, everyone knows you're the smartest person in the school! I'm certainly not the smartest."

"None of you Americans are," Seamus said.

Rachel gave him a look. "_That's_ the pot calling the kettle black." She squawked as Seamus, not wasting valuable breath, lunged at her.

"Hey, hey!" Dean said, stepping between them and holding out his arms. "Honestly, you two squabble like an old married couple!"

Where did _you _think Harry learned it?

"Hermione, even Hannah's not as smart as you," Katelyn said, completely ignoring the mini soap opera unfolding behind her.

"That's right…hey!" Hannah glared at Katelyn.

"Oops! I mean…nice Schmurf." She patted Hannah on the head, but Hannah continued to give her the Look Of Death. "When I said you weren't smart, I meant that you were genius!"

Hannah smiled in satisfaction and went back to her work.

"Sure," Seamus said, sitting back down, "and someone knows when to stop their teasing." He shot Rachel a look.

"Sure now," she teased, a mock Irish brogue rolling her words.

Seamus folded his arms. "Thanks for that."

She grinned. "Sure now."

"Stop it."

"Sure now."

"Stop that…"

"Sure now."

"Stop."

"Sure now."

"Stop!"

"Okay."

Seamus rolled his moss-green eyes toward the heavens. "Is that Flitwick's homework, Hermione?" he asked, looking over at her parchment.

She twitched it away. "No, it's Astronomy. You finished it already, I saw you."

"That's too bad," he said in disappointment.

"And that's the truth." Rachel shrieked as Seamus bolted from his chair. "Child abuse! Child abuse!" she cried as he chased her around the common room.

Everyone watched impassively as Rachel ran up the stairs to the dorms, Seamus close behind. A second later, there was a bang, a thud, and Seamus slid back into view, robes wrapped around his head and arms.

"Boys can't get into the girls' dorms, Seamus," Katelyn said indifferently.

He stood and straightened his robes over his sweater and slacks. "Thanks for telling me that," he said dryly.

"Welcome."


	7. It's Almost Over! And School, Too

The next night, Hannah and Tanya were up late into the night, trying to finish their homework. The fire was smoldering in the fireplace and everyone else had gone to bed long ago. Tanya was working on her Potions essay and Hannah was struggling with Astronomy.

"What time is it?" Tanya asked with a yawn.

"Twelve-thirty," Hannah replied, glancing down at her watch.

"Oh, I want to go to bed!" Tanya cried and sprawled out on the floor.

"I know, but we've got to get this finished so we don't fail. Do you really want Snape to fail you?"

"Definitely not!" Tanya exclaimed and began to scribble more words on her parchment. Suddenly, they heard a noise from up the boys' staircase.

"What's that?" Hannah whispered.

"I don't know," Tanya replied, "but I want to find out." She held perfectly still and blended like a chameleon into the semidarkness. There she and Hannah waited patiently for whomever it was to show themselves. When they did, Hannah couldn't muffle her gasp of surprise.

"Harry?"

He jumped and nearly dropped the lantern he was carrying. "Uh, hi." He hid a silvery cloak behind his back.

"What are you doing?"

"You'll get caught!"

"I wouldn't do it if I were you!"

"Don't you care if you get expelled?"

"Look," Harry lied in exasperation, "I just want to…to see Professor McGonagall about a dream I had." He then pushed past them and clambered out the portrait hole.

"Men," Hannah sighed, and went back to her work.

-------------------------

"I _love _Quidditch!" Tanya shrieked, her blonde ponytail bobbing up and down with excitement.

"I _normally _do," Rachel said. Her face was pale with nerves. "Stay safe, Harry," she moaned. "Cedric Diggory's on that team, and Snape's refereeing."

"Cedric Diggory?" Seamus asked.

"Fourth year Seeker. Tall, talented, handsome, not at all full of himself…someone you'd love to hate."

"Aye," Seamus agreed, with a dark look towards the Hufflepuffs.

"Oh, Harry," Hermione said, patting the pocket where her wand was.

"The more risk the better," Katelyn cried, shaking the stands with her excited jumping. "Everyone likes Quidditch! See? Even Dumbledore's come to watch!"

Hermione and Rachel's heads whipped around. "Dumbledore?" Sure enough, there he was. There was no mistaking that silvery beard.

"Oh, thank goodness," Rachel sighed, sagging on Seamus with relief. They had quite forgotten their little spat from the week before. "I thought Harry was a goner."

"Sure, what with Snape refereeing," Seamus said.

"Sure, now."

"Let's not start this again," he warned.

Rachel snickered. "You Irish are funny. Not bright, but funny."

Seamus looked rather pleased with himself. "Thank you ver—HEY!"

Rachel was about to get chased again (and this time there were no girls' dorms around), when Neville, on Seamus' other side, turned around to face—Malfoy.

"I-I'm worth t-t-twelve of you, Malf-f-foy," he stammered, face blotchy with anger and fear.

"You tell him, Neville," Ron said.

"Longbottom, if brains were gold, you'd be poorer than Weasley, and that's saying something."

Rachel turned around, wand in hand. "Shut it, Malfoy."

He sneered. "What are _you _going to do about it, Muggle filth?"

She sneered right back. "Wouldn't be talking if I were you." Crabbe and Goyle cracked their knuckles menacingly, and she looked over at them. "You're _eleven_," she said scathingly. "Would you _really _hit a girl?"

"Harry!" Hermione shrieked suddenly.

Rachel turned her attention back to the game as Harry streaked toward the ground. "Come on, Harry!" she shouted.

"You're in luck, Weasley, Potter's obviously spotted some money on the ground!"

Ron leapt out of his seat, but Rachel and Hannah, who had been listening, beat him to it. "It's a good thing Potter found that money, because you're going to need it for your hospital bill when we're through with you!" Rachel hissed.

And slapped him full across the mouth.

Hannah followed up nicely with a sound thump from her Charms textbook. "Take that, Malfoy!"

"Mudbloods," Malfoy spat, wiping the blood from his lip.

And that was a mistake.

Ron, Neville, and Seamus leapt over the seats and tackled Malfoy. Confused, Hannah and Rachel could do nothing but hope their hexes hit the right people. In the end, Ron and Neville got by with only minor injuries, while Seamus had gotten in the way of one of Rachel's body-binding curses and received a bloody nose from Goyle.

"Sorry," Rachel said, performing the countercurse. "Now get up before someone sees. Besides—we won again!"

"Nice," Seamus said darkly, staunching the blood with his robes.

---------------------------------------

"Heads up!"

Everyone ducked as a book bag came hurtling toward the table. "You're a _witch, _Rachel," Hannah said irritably. "Can't you just _levitate _your stuff over?"

Rachel rubbed her dark-circled eyes and made a spot for herself between Tanya and Hermione. "Exams are _tomorrow, _Hannah. I don't have time to 'float them over'."

Hermione shoved her fingers in her ears and began reciting the twelve uses of dragon's blood as Seamus threw an empty inkbottle into the fire. "Aye, I'm gonna fail, and me mam will personally decapitate me."

Rachel ignored him. "Usually I'd tease him about that."

"Goes to show how nervous you are," Katelyn said distractedly.

"Yeah."

-------------------------------

It was sweltering hot in the room where they took their written exams. Succumbing to the heat and nerves, one by one, each first year removed their robes and loosened their ties and rolled their sleeves up. Their stress was showing: Seamus' arm was twitching uncontrollably; Tanya was drumming her fingers on the desk; Ron's head was so close to the paper that his nose nearly touched it; Katelyn was chewing absentmindedly on the end of her quill; Hannah was scribbling furiously; and Rachel's leg was shaking violently.

Katelyn sighed heavily, shifting positions so her shoes scuffed the floor loudly. Rachel threw her a murderous glance, but Katelyn didn't notice and continued with her exam.

Rachel stared at the parchment, but she couldn't help thinking of things other than her exam. She glanced over at Seamus. _Leprechaun…_ she thought, and snickered. _Finnigan's after me Lucky Charms!_ She had to stifle her laughter in her white shirt, and succeeded in smearing ink across her sleeve.

Hannah and Dean looked up and she nodded toward Seamus' back. There, Dean had stuck a sign that said: _Beware, the Leprechaun Bites _in bold letters. Hannah dissolved in silent giggles, and Dean looked pleased with himself.

This is the best school ever, Rachel thought, and went back to her exam. 


	8. The End of An Era

"Finally!" Rachel said as they came out of the exam room. "That was mass homicide!"

Katelyn grinned. "And I thought I-SATs were hard!"

All the Brits (and one Irishman) looked at her funny. "'I sats'?" Ron asked.

Katelyn nodded. "Illinois Standard Achievement Tests. They're crap," she added, wrinkling her nose.

Rachel gave a crooked grin. "But, hey, look on the bright side! At least we don't have to know things like when the War of 1812 was."

Hannah laughed, then got an odd look on her face and began humming. Rachel and Katelyn's faces lit up, and they all began singing. "Always look on the bright side of life! La la, la la, la la la la, la, la! Always look on the light side of life! La, la, la—"

"Well, whatever," Seamus said, interrupting the girls' Monty Python sing-along, "I'm just glad school's over with." His mouth twisted, and everyone knew he dearly wanted to add an Irish interjection.

"And that's the truth," Rachel said with a grin. She reached over his shoulder and pulled the sign off his back. "I want you to know, Finnigan, that just because school's over doesn't mean this is over." She handed him the parchment and watched his face turn red.

"I love school," Hannah sighed as she and Katelyn watched Seamus chase Rachel and Dean out onto the grounds.

------------------------------------

The next week passed in a glorious haze of warm, lazy afternoons and cool, delightful evenings, all filled, of course, with plenty of laughter (and the occasional death-defying adventure from Harry and Ron and Hermione to spice up an otherwise dull day.).

That is, until exam results came in.

"My parents will _kill _me," Katelyn moaned that night at supper. "_A_s or _P_s on nearly everything."

"I got mostly _A_s and _E_s," said Hannah, looking at her list. "The occasional _O…"_

_"_Same here," Rachel and Tanya chimed.

Sarah, who had come to join them at the Gryffindor table for the year-end feast, looked dejectedly at the Slytherin decorations. "I don't really care about school anymore."

"Why ever not?"

"It's summer, dorks! They're keeping us here until the best part is over. Plus, Slytherin's won the House Cup."

Hannah shrugged. "The year's been well-spent."

"Hear, hear," Rachel said, looking around at all her friends: Hannah, Sarah, Katelyn, Tanya, Seamus, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Dean, and Haley.

Seamus was about to reply when Dumbledore stood. "Another year gone! And I must trouble you with an old man's wheezing waffle before we sink our teeth into our delicious feast. What a year it has been! Hopefully our heads are all a little fuller than they were…you have the whole summer ahead to get them nice and empty before next year starts…

"Now, as I understand it, the House Cup needs awarding, and the points stand thus: in fourth place, Gryffindor with three hundred and twelve points; in third, Hufflepuff with three hundred and fifty-two points; Ravenclaw has four hundred and twenty-six and Slytherin, four hundred and seventy-two."

Sarah got up glumly and returned to her table; the Gryffindors sat glumly with their chins in their hands as Slytherin cheered mightily.

"Yes, yes, well done, Slytherin. However, recent events must be taken into account."

Elbows slipped off tables and heads lifted as Dumbledore awarded some 'last minute points'. Finally—

"We're tied with Slytherin!"

"…I therefore award ten points to Mr. Neville Longbottom."

There was never such a celebration like there was that night.

--------------------------

With a screech, the Hogwarts Express rolled into Platform Nine-and-Three-Quarters, and people began tumbling out. Tanya, Hannah, Rachel, Haley, Sarah, and Katelyn huddled close together, because it had been agreed upon that Rachel's father would escort them home to the U.S.A.

"Well, the school year's over," Hermione said as she, Ron, Harry, Seamus, and Dean came over to stand by them.

Rachel sniffed, trying to disguise her tears by looking for her dad. "Ah, there he is." She waved at him, and then turned to her friends. "Adios, amigos." She threw her arms around them, even catching Dean, Seamus, Harry, and Ron in the process. "Promise me you'll come back next year."

Seamus raised an eyebrow as Rachel retrieved a tissue and blew her nose. "We have to come back to Hogwarts, Hekman."

"Oh. Well, don't die or anything, you hear?"

"We'll try not to," Harry replied. "Bye!"

"Bye!" everyone called back as he left with his unpleasant-looking aunt and uncle.

"Poor Harry," Hannah sighed as she got in the back of the car with Tanya, Rachel, Katelyn, Haley, and Sarah.

"Yeah," Tanya added. "It's too bad that Harry has to live with the worst Muggles ever!"

"How do you know they're really that bad?" Sarah asked.

"We've heard stories," Katelyn said dryly.

Sarah gave her a suspicious look, then jumped as Haley suddenly wailed, "I already miss my Oliver!"

"And I miss Pickles, even though she isn't technically allowed to be called Pickles anymore because technically she isn't part of the Funny Farm anymore!" Rachel buried her face in her hands.

"Hey, where is Shelby?" Katelyn asked, panicking. "We haven't really seen her all last semester."

"You don't think we left her at King's Cross?" Haley asked.

"No, she went to the airport with the Malfoys. Mr. and Mrs. Root are going to have a fit."

"I despise Malfoy so much!" Hannah cried passionately. "He stole our Shelby!"

"We _all _hate him," Rachel assured her, and everyone nodded.

"Who's this Malfoy boy?" Mr. Hekman asked curiously.

Everyone exchanged glances.

"It's a long story, Dad!"

The End

_A/N: Hi, this is Sushi here! I just wanted to say thanks for sticking around to the end of this story. We all really appreciate it! So be sure to read **The Funny Farm and the Chamber of Secrets, **coming to December 7, 2006. See our profile for more details._


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